Monday, September 9, 2013

Dumb Ways to Die = Dumb Ways to Get Your iPod Taken Away

Have any of you heard the latest craze in Apps for kids called "Dumb Ways to Die"? It's a game where you try to save the danger seeking blob-like animated characters from death. It appears to be geared toward kids, but, in my opinion, it's inappropriate for children despite the disclaimer "Fun for people of all ages".


In one level you have to "defend your private parts from piranhas". 











Other levels have you remove a fork from a toaster, stop the gushing blood, clean up vomit... 








I will let you be the judge. Here are the lyrics and video to the "catchy tune" kids are singing now that they're hooked on this game:




Set fire to your hair
Poke a stick at a grizzly bear
Eat medicine that's out of date
Use your private parts as piranha bait

Dumb ways to die, so many dumb ways to die, dumb ways to di-i-i-ie, so many dumb ways to die

Get your toast out with a fork
Do your own electrical work
Teach yourself how to fly
Eat a two week old unrefrigerated pie

Dumb ways to die, so many dumb ways to die, dumb ways to di-i-i-ie, so many dumb ways to die

Invite a psycho-killer inside
Scratch a drug dealer's brand new ride
Take your helmet off in outer space
Use your clothes dryer as a hiding place

Dumb ways to die, so many dumb ways to die, dumb ways to di-i-i-ie, so many dumb ways to die

Keep a rattlesnake as pet
Sell both your kidneys on the internet
Eat a tube of superglue
"I wonder what's this red button do?"

Dumb ways to die, so many dumb ways to die, dumb ways to di-i-i-ie, so many dumb ways to die

Dress up like a moose during hunting season
Disturb a nest of wasps for no good reason
Stand on the edge of a train station platform
Drive around the boom gates at a level crossing
Run across the tracks between the platforms
They may not rhyme but they're quite possibly

Dumbest ways to die
Dumbest ways to die
Dumbest ways to di-i-i-ie
So many dumb
So many dumb ways to die

***********************************

"Be safe around trains. A message from Metro." 








Um, WHAT?? 
Metro Trains Melbourne created this App as a train safety campaign. Yes, you read that right; part of a safety campaign.  What are you saying Metro Trains of Melbourne? 

"Hey kids, we fully endorse sticking a fork in a toaster to retrieve your (last) breakfast, stirring up a wasps nest to see what happens, eating Superglue for the hell-of-it, and suffocating in a clothes dryer playing hide-n-seek.....

But be real careful around trains now, ya hear?"