Thursday, February 20, 2014

Performance Reviews for Parents?!

I work full time for a construction management firm where we have yearly performance reviews. Most of the time, I feel I do a good job meeting the company’s expectations. But there are times when I THINK I’m doing a good job, but somehow I have completely missed the boat. Unless someone is there to guide me back on task, I keep moving in a direction that isn’t necessarily the right one. My intentions are good, but my deliverable isn’t up to par. I need to reevaluate, be aware, make the adjustments and move on.

As a mom, I feel that it’s just as important to have my performance evaluated as well. We spend day in and day out with our kids, parenting: “please sit up straight”, “why didn’t you make your bed when I asked?”  “Why is this grade not an A!” “Put your phone away at the table” "Why can't you replace the toilet paper roll?" It’s our job to give guidance and advice even if it isn’t necessarily always welcomed on the receiving end. With that said, I often wonder how I am doing with this whole Mom thing. When was the last time you looked at your kid and said, “Am I doing a good job?”  Like my job outside of the home, I think I’m doing fairly well, but no one really tells me otherwise. (probably from fear of getting grounded) So I put on my big girl panties and asked the big question to my 4 kids.

"If you could describe your mom in 5 words, what would they be?"

As I asked the question to my older 3 boys, I suddenly felt sick to my stomach. The feeling was the exact one I feel at work, but this time it was personal! Ouch!

My oldest was first to answer. His response was almost immediate. I wasn’t really sure if that was a good sign or not. Then I read his text:


Uh, wait.... did he say "crazy"?

My third son answered next.

Alwaysright? Damn straight, son. That answer may partly stem from my turning into the proper English/grammar police with him lately. If correcting him makes me alwaysright, I don't wanna be alwayswrong.

My second son then answered:

Annoying? What the??? Well... to be honest, I guess I am all up in their business (hence the questionnaire and detective comment from Mann boy #1) I s'pose that could be annoying to a teenager. But teenagers are annoying so we're even. 

I decided with my 10 year old to add a couple of questions. He's pretty brutally honest. Let's face it, that's the entire point of a performance review, no? To get honest feedback? Not to mention he has the most years left stuck in the house with his mother, so I felt I may need to specifically pay attention to what he has to say.

Here are his brilliant honest answers.
My favorite child
Apparently I'm funny, according to 100% of my children. I'm not sure that's necessarily a good thing. Do they not take me seriously? Am I 'cool' funny? Or am I "she's so stupid - funny?"

The 10 year old also thinks I'm cheery, skinny, nice, and fun. Did I mention skinny? 

I could do better by taking him to McDonalds and La Cocina (his fave Mexican restaurant) more. Get a job, kid. I annoy him by making him go to bed early. Tough shiznit. And I make him happy by taking him to sports. If that's the case, he should seriously be the happiest kid in the world. I drag his arse to A LOT of sports.

In summary, I'm a funny, caring, nice, helpful, smart, loving, fun, crazy, silly, cheery, annoying, protective, questionnaire, skinny detective who is always right.

My assessment of their evaluation?

Nailed it!

Skinny Mom